"Taking Off Your Mask" was the topic of our ladies' retreat, and the speaker was a woman named Debby Price. She and her husband used to go to our chruch, but then they moved out to Wichita, KS for her husband's job. They have 4 boys too. Both Debby and her husband are children of preachers, although she did say that her family (growing up) never thought she would ever be a speaker at a retreat, since she was not a public speaker by any means! She was very nice and friendly, with a very vibrant walk with the Lord. I was sorry we weren't around when they were at our church to get to know them more.
She gave her testimony Friday night, and then on Saturday she started talking about why we wear masks. She had a handout with 2 circles on it, both being ways to solve problems. The first way is to have a problem, respond and try to fix it (since everyone wants to be in control!). Then you either succeed or fail, but eventually you will fail at fixing some problem. Then you feel anger, shame and fear, so you put on a mask, withdraw, and feel defeated.
The second way involves responding to your problem by trusting the Lord. Then there is either success or failure, but you can be confident that "our character is more important than our comfort", and that no matter what happens, God is in control of the situation. Then you can feel peace and be open about your struggles, walking in obedience. That leads to freedom, and you see your problem as a testimony to the Lord's power and faithfulness.
She said a lot more, but this first part really spoke to me, since we've been struggling so much with the issue of our future, and what we should be doing with our house. I can really see that I am not trusting God to take care of us, but more importantly, I really am not trusting that the Lord will speak to Bob and work in his life, even through potentially bad decisions, to draw him closer too. I really want to know the whole plan--at once! Debby said once, "My future doesn't depend on me fixing it", but right now I feel like that is where I'm at, and I have not experienced peace . . . well, since we moved here! We had a time of prayer Saturday night, and that whole issue is what I asked prayer for. The ladies prayed for both of us, and it was a real encouragement to me. Of course, I went home Sunday, and Bob and I got into a raging fight about what else, what we should do with our house, and I feel like it must have been satanic! Fortunately we were able to talk about some things later, but obviously this is an issue that Satan feels he can use to divide us. Specifically, the issue is "should we sell the house sooner rather than later". Interest rates are going up, and the fear is that there will be a much smaller pool of buyers who will be able to afford our house (and a bigger pool of houses for sale) when it is time to sell (in a another year or 2?). So maybe we should try to sell now and live in a rental until we are ready to move. The only flaw in this plan is that we will be having a baby in 8 weeks, so we aren't really in a position right now to get a house ready to sell, much less pack everything up and move ourselves. So some of the conflict is that we don't have many options right now, and that leads one to look back and question previous decisions leading us to where we are now. But since we can't change those things, that is a pretty counterproductive little exercise, although it does considerably raise the tension levels!
Right now, the bottom line for me anyways is to be open to how God is leading Bob and also to trust that God has us where we are for a reason. I have been praying that God would clearly reveal to us, especially Bob, what he wants us to do, and I'll continue to pray that. But really, what it comes down to is saying, "You know what you're doing, and I trust you, Lord". That takes the pressure off of me! I still would like to experience more of his peace though, LOL!
7 comments:
Since the Lord made it abundantly clear (He did, didn't He?) that this was the house for your family then I believe He will make it abundantly clear when it is time for you to sell. Obviously, this ISN'T the time since you are at the tail end of your pregnancy etc. Why would the Lord give you a house for a year or so and then move you into a rental for 2 more years? That doesn't make sense to me.
The other thing, it really won't matter what the interest rate is, the buying pool is etc. Since the Lord led you this far, He will certainly provide the buyer, at the proper time, in His timing.
Relax...Trust...Pray...
"Sometimes a way seems right to a man...." God isn't man and He doesn't think as man does but I do know He has your family's BEST interest at heart. Not what is good or even better, but the VERY BEST! :) I love you all! We will begin praying for wisdom, discernment and UNITY!
Yeah...what AC said!
Take a deep breath and let go. It'll be all right. It always has and it always will. Even if you cant see or feel it now.
I too will be praying for you Claire.
We do appreciate your prayers!
Last year, the house was worth $865,000, and right now this year, maybe $775. It's a nice 1993 colonial.
I think God wants us to both pray and think. Interest rates were artificially lowered after 9/11 (Mr Greenspan called this "accomodation"). Now that the market seems to have peaked, there are 2.5 houses for sale for every buyer--instead of less than one house for sale for every buyer last year. Part of this is that rates have gone up, and another is that now that the market has retraced (come down) people are not so eager to pay $5000/month to buy houses like ours (rest easier--our payment, at the low point of interest rates is a little over half of that).
So, I'm thinking you both would pitch in to pay off the balance on this house that cost $700,000? LOL!
Thanks, Bob
OK, first things first - EIGHT WEEKS!?!?!?!? Wow, how'd that come up so quickly?! My goodness, Claire, how are you feeling? I'll bet you look wonderful. *sentimental sniffle*
OK, and now on to the meat and how God does the wonderful (weird) things He does. I JUST finished reading this entry before I came to have coffee with you:
http://spotthisblog.blogspot.com/2006/01/take-no-thought-for-your-life.html
Go read it. I think you will find it encouraging.
When we got to MD, and saw the housing market there, I panicked. I pushed really hard to buy. Something. Anything. NOW NOW NOW! But I also prayed that the Lord would give Zorak discernment. Zorak never felt at peace about buying. (For a while, I was convinced he just wasn't listening to me, er, I mean the Lord...) Granted, when the time came to move, we could have made over 40K on the sale of something we'd bought immediately.
BUT, when the time came to go, God moved us from job posting/application to start date - in under two weeks - and there is no way we could have done that w/ a house to sell. The results would have been hard on our family, and Zorak may not have been able to accept the position here. The outcome, had we leaned so heavily on what *I* wanted to do, would not have been what I'd have wanted for our family. But God had given Zorak discernment, and the overall picture was greater than just the numbers, or just the panic-factor, or, basically, just my incomplete understanding of His Will.
All that to say, keep praying, keep trusting, and believe that even if it looks like nobody's listening, God truly does have a plan. We just have to be still and listen. I'll be praying, as well. Limbo is hard. {{hugs}}
Bob...methinks you know too much.
Dy, that was a great blog post you forwarded--I read through "My Utmost . . ." as well, and I had many similar thoughts as that man when I read that day's devotional! It's such a journey, this Christian life, and there is certainly always something going on. Thanks for sharing your experience too. It all helps! : )
Claire, I just want you to know that I had to move right before UR was born, from Watertown, NY to Syracuse, NY.
Now, just focus on having this baby and don't WORRY about moving. When the time is right you and Bob will know it. Love, Nana
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