Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Pregnancy Hindsight

Since it was one week ago today that I stopped being pregnant, I thought it would be good to take a look back at this pregnancy and see what lessons I learned.

1. The doctor does matter. I am a pretty hands-off pregnant person and birther--I just want to be left alone, and I don't need or want a lot of hand-holding. So I didn't think it really mattered much when at my first appointment, the doctor made a big deal about my risk of hemorrhage, and how their office had all that birth control stuff everywhere, and they kept talking about permanent measures of birth control, etc. I never really felt like they were on the same page as me, and I really wasn't that confident in them, that they had MY best interests in mind, but I didn't think it mattered too much. I would just do my thing, and that would be that. After all, I have given birth several times in military hospitals with perfect strangers delivering, and that was just fine. Looking back, however, now I wonder if she could have done something different . . . if the baby got stuck because she didn't turn it right or something. I don't even know. And the whole induction thing. I agreed to it because I thought the baby would be smaller and I was ready to not be pregnant anymore, LOL, but that wasn't her reason at all. She didn't really HAVE a good reason, and so I just didn't have any confidence in her. I think it DID make a difference in the whole experience.

But what else could I have done about the doctor? I have thought about what if I chose Bethesda instead. I know they would not have induced me unless I was having actual problems or was 2 weeks late. But you know--driving over 45 minutes one way to appointments would have just not worked, with Anna still being so young. Who could I have obligated to watch all my other kids for such long periods of time, especially when one of them was still a baby herself and needed a lot of attention?! And there were no other doctors in this area that took Tricare Standard and were accepting new patients, so I really don't think I had any other option. I will have to chalk this up to being God's plan that I don't understand.

2. Constipation is bad. This pregnancy, I was Miss Super-Fiber. I ate bran muffins made with extra fiber All-Bran. I exercised pretty much every day. Towards the end I took Colase. I can honestly say I have never felt better during a pregnancy! But the last 2 weeks or so I STILL struggled with contipation, no matter how many prunes, muffins, or Colase I ate. I think this was one reason why the baby did not descend very quickly--there wasn't as much room as needed! As I was starting to push, I told the doctor and nurse that next time I would ask for an enema. "What! We don't do those anymore!" they quickly exclaimed. But I think it would have helped.

With Anna, I took castor oil the weekend before I had her (on a Tuesday as well). It did work, although Anna passed meconium before birth. Before I took the castor oil, I did a lot of research and was convinced that it did not pass over the placenta and so could not make the baby's bowels move. But after Anna's did, I was not so sure, and although Anna had no problems with the meconium, I didn't want to try that this time. Now I'm thinking maybe I should have taken that chance. I don't know what I would do if I got pregnant again and it came time for my due date and I was constipated. Hmmmm.

3. The whole weird labor and delivery was a fitting end to this pregnancy, which was not what I would call "smooth" from the beginning. Getting pregnant while nursing a 4-month old exclusively, finding out about the pregnancy when all of a sudden your milk starts drying up and being rejected by your baby, having the waiver for off-base OB care be denied this time, having such a hard time finding a doctor, having a weird first ultrasound with secretive techs who made us think something was wrong when it wasn't, failing the 1 hour glucose test--everything was different about this pregnancy, so I suppose it is fitting that the labor and delivery was as well.

Who knows, this might be my last pregnancy--but I sort of hope it isn't, since it didn't leave me with good, happy pregnancy feelings. I would love to have another pregnancy with a supportive, competent midwife that feels the same way I do about kids and such. And while we're at it, I'd like to move into our dream home on 5 acres or so in Ohio between my parents and Amy, LOL. So I will stop wishing and just be grateful for a healthy, happy baby. Truly Grace is a gift from God, in His perfect timing and plan.


witw said...

I know of an awesome doctor in Texas. There is plenty of land in Texas and housing is cheap. Ohio is too cold and not much to do there.
Most doctors offices have birth control posters and information. At least it gives you something to read while you are waiting. Melinda

witw said...

That is a good idea to give yourself an enema before your next future induction. Pooping on the delivery bed is so gross, but everyone poops.

Chris and Johanna said...

I'm am all for the widwife. We are going to have a midwife at home for the next baby. I just wish doctors could learn to be a little more open-minded, and a lot less patronizing.
Good luck on your dream house. :D