Attitude Issues

We've been dealing with a lot of bad attitudes lately. My friend Beverly posted an entry on her blog a few days ago about her struggles with her kids in this area, so I know it's not just me, but still . . . it's been quite overwhelming. All the boys are dealing with some big issue right now. I suppose I could just blame it all on the upcoming changes, etc., but that wouldn't really be accurate. More likely is the fact that I am big and bulky, and I haven't been responding as I should to them. Here's a rundown of some of the big issues:

Jonathan: has started giving us problems going to sleep at night. He actually started this several nights before we moved him into his big bed, so it's not that. He will lie down for awhile, then burst into loud, noisy tears, the kind you might cry if you suddenly fell out of bed or discovered your teddy bear was missing (and you are 2!). But there is never any problem, and he will do this 3 or 4 times before finally settling down. We've started a "zero tolerance" policy on this one, and last night there was only one incidence, so maybe we are on the right track here. But that leads us into Caleb's problem . . .

Caleb: has become very crabby and whiney. It's so different from how he normally is. He doesn't want to go to AWANA, and last week he didn't want to go to Sunday School. He cries at the drop of a hat, and makes a big production out of everything. His reason for the bad attitude? Always "I'm tired". Now I think there is actually some validity to this. Caleb doesn't take a nap anymore, but he needs a good solid 12 hours of sleep at night, which he is not getting because of Jonathan. Not only is Jonathan not going right off to sleep, but he also wakes up a lot earlier than Caleb normally would, which has only become a problem since they started sharing a room. I've instituted an hour long in-bed (in my bed) rest time (no books or anything like he would normally get). He doesn't like it, but I've explained that little boys who are constantly tired must get more rest, or else not use that as an excuse. I am contemplating putting him to bed earlier than Jonathan and the other boys, but I just haven't seen how that would practically work right now.

Nathan and Luke: I would just call their problems "general bad attitude issues", but there has been a lot of bickering lately. Luke certainly knows exactly how to quietly push Nathan's buttons, and Nathan responds so predictably. He starts talking higher and faster, in a voice that sounds as if he is going to burst into tears at any second. He gets very loud--totally unhinged, it seems to me. In a nutshell, no one is honoring the other before himself.

So there you have it. Whew! And I'm sure you can imagine that my responses are not always "full of grace, seasoned with salt" (Col. 4:6), as they should be! In my Bible -reading time, I'm in First Samuel, and I've been struck again by how many times godly men of the Old Testament did not leave sons who carried on a godly legacy. Eli is a good example, as his sons were "very wicked men" who stole choice offering parts, slept with the temple women, etc. Eli got a harsh indictment from God in I Sam. 2:29b "Why do you honor your sons more than me by fattening yourselves in the choice parts of every offering made by my people Israel?" The Lord told Samuel in 3:13 "For I told [Eli] that I would judge his family forever because of the sin he knew about; his sons made themselves contemptible, and he failed to restain them." So Samuel had that to look back on, but what about his sons? He appointed them to be judges to replace himself, but as 8:3 says, "His sons did not walk in his ways. They turned aside after dishonest gain and accepted bribes and perverted justice." And the people of Israel used this as thier reason to ask for a king instead of God in 8:5 "They said to him, 'You are old, and your sons do not walk in your ways; now appoint a king to lead us, such as all the other nations have.'" How crushing that must have been to Samuel to hear that, and to know that he was partly to blame, since he was not leaving a godly legacy in his own sons! For sure, Samuel did not receive the same rebuke or judgement from God that Eli did, and adult children certainly have the abililty to choose agaisnt God, but I'm sure that Samuel constantly thought back to his sons' childhood and wondered if there was more he could have done to train them to have a godly character. Maybe not spend so much time away from home each year or something? Who knows. What I do know is that I do not want to be accused of honoring my sons or myself more than God by not correcting disobedience when I see it, even if it is not comfortable or convenient to do so.