Looking back

Today I am finally feeling as though I might actually be getting better. Praise the Lord! I am still coughing, and my side still hurts, but I am coughing less, so I think my side will start feeling better too. Two weeks of sickness--wow, I can't even really remember the last time I've been sick for so long. Hmmm, I think it was the summer before my sophomore year of college when I had mono. Bob and I were dating seriously then, and he would stop by my house to bring me Frosties from Wendy's, which were about the only thing I could have, since my throat was so incredibly sore. I thought I had it so terribly then, poor, poor little sick girl! In fact, I had it so wonderfully easy--my mom was there to take of me, I had a devoted boyfriend to bring me special treats, and (this is the key) NO ONE ELSE DEPENDED ON ME FOR ANYTHING! I could just lie around and get better! What a novel concept. And I'm sure as I moped around back then, feeling sorry for myself, I did not appreciate that idea as I should have. I know had I been able to look forward 13 years and see myself married and homeschooling 4 boys under 8, I would have never imagined I could even cope when I was healthy, much less sick! I was definitely your average immature, self-centered 19 year-old. Have you ever wondered if God really is working in your life because it seems like you always just struggle with the same things? I do, but as I look back to the college-and-just-married me, I can see differences and growth, especially relating to taking care of others. And the Lord has definitely used my family to work a lot of things out in me. The sole reason I am functioning in this season of life right now is because of the grace and power of the Lord, not any natural gifts and talents for nuturing needy little beings. Being sick certainly has a way of bringing all that into clear focus! Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking any good thing. I Peter 1:2-4